Love

I am pondering what love is and how it works. Only in the English language can we say, "I love pizza" and "I love God." The meaning is totally different. So those are fairly straight forward but what does it mean to love your husband? You kids? Yourself?? and how do you love those people. One answer I would want to answer is unconditionally, but is that possible? truly, be honest, possible? I would have a hard time saying yes. I would want to love unconditionally but when you are hurting, it is so hard to forgive, forget and continue to love. Ok, technically, I know it IS possible, but it is really, really hard to do.

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedi

a

Love is an emotion of a strong affection and personal attachment.^[1] Love is also a virtue representing all of human kindness, compassion, and affection; and "the unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another".^[2] Love may also be described as actions towards others or oneself based on compassion, or as actions towards others based on affection.

From dictionary.com

love

   [luhv] Show IPA noun, verb, loved, lov·ing.

noun

1.

a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.

2.

a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, asfor a parent, child, or friend.

3.

sexual passion or desire.

4.

a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person;sweetheart.

5.

(used in direct address as a term of endearment, affection,or the like): Would you like to see a movie, love?

EXPAND

verb (used with object)

15.

to have love or affection for: All her pupils love her.

16.

to have a profoundly tender, passionate affection for(another person).

17.

to have a strong liking for; take great pleasure in: to lovemusic.

18.

to need or require; benefit greatly from: Plants love sunlight.

19.

to embrace and kiss (someone), as a lover.

So I think to most interesting thing is love can be a noun or a verb. Do people get those two confused??

Can you "Love" (the verb) even when you don't "Love" (the noun)? What if you are mad at that person, what does love look like then?

These are just few questions I am pondering today... and every day... :o)

self awareness

So I haven't posted in a long.... time..... I just don't know if this is where I need to spend my energy. I am quite indecisive. Good golly!

So I found this article on FB today and I decided, for some reason, I needed to post it onto this blog. Even though I haven't written on here in mult. years? Why?? Maybe this was a calling? a nudge from God? Who knows, but I decided I should follow the instructions because it just might help someone? Who knows?

http://themagneticentrepreneur.com/123/why-you-might-be-having-trouble-feeling-grateful/

I am reading a book called "The Mindful Way Through Depression" and it basically follows what this article says. You can't just decided to be more grateful and not give other emotions their time they need. They are emotions and who is to say that we aren't allowed to feel that way? Guilt and gratitude can not live in the same place at the same time! I like it!

I biggest problem at this very moment is how do I give those I love time and energy that I feel I need to give to myself? I don't give myself time and energy... I know this is no ones problem but my own. No one forces me to live and think that way. I do it on my own free will. I just don't know how to "give" to everyone. I don't know how to make myself a priority without sacrificing others. My husband I haven't been getting along at all lately. It make me sad and angry. That I can't figure out how to make this work out without compromising myself... how do you do that? It is the same as finding time to exercise without something else sacrificing? It seems so complicated, however I believe the answer is easy, I just can't seem to see it. I have a few friends who seem to do well with this. When I ask them about it, they don't even seem to understand the question. This is what makes me believe it is easy... it is so easy that people don't understand the question when I ask it. They must be thinking, "she must not be asking what I think she is asking...that is crazy???" It kinda makes me smile just thinking about it.

Trying this out

Well, I tried to get this post from the internet but I can't seem to add what I want it to add.
I took this info because I think some of this is the root of my problems. Funny, when you read it they don't seem to be character flaws... at least I wouldn't think so.

Spiritual and calm, you tend to live a quiet but enriching life.
You are very giving of yourself. And it's hard for you to let go of relationships.

The purpose of your life: showing love to other people

Famous blues include: Angelina Jolie, the Dali Lama, Oprah

Careers for you to try: Psychic, Peace Corps Volunteer, Counselor

Here is the link of where to get this and other great little quizes.

www.blogthings.com/whatcolorisyourauraquiz/

Here is me

Well, starting this blog and I am not exactly sure what I should be saying here. Kinda feels silly at first, but I guess I will get used to it. I am trying to figure out what the whole life thing is and what it is all about. Here are some things I hope to find answers to and am pondering at the time:
*How do you make others happy but don't compromise yourself in the meantime.
*How do you change yourself if you don't like something. I know how to change how I eat, but how do I change
how I feel?
*Do others have the same hard time at all of this as I do?

*Why am I not happy?

*How do I get happy or am I supposed to be? Maybe no one is really happy and I have too high of expectations?


I am sure I will come up with others but in the meantime I am going to introduce myself.

I am a 37 year old woman living in Portland Oregon. I am a wife and a mother. I have 3 kids. An 18 year old girl who just graduated from high school and will be starting college soon. A 13 year old boy who is in the 8th grade. A 9 year old girl in the 4th grade. My husband is working on becoming a Life Coach and has lived in Portland all of his adult life. I just moved here 5 years ago from McMinnville Oregon when we met and got married.
I am a nurse and I don't love it. I don't even like it much. I went to school to help people. No, I really did. I just adored the idea. I unfortunately don't seem to do much of that at all. I seem to do alot of paperwork and spend most of my day making the state happy. (or trying to anyway but personally, I think it is impossible.)

I should say this is my second marriage since I think alot of my problems come from my first one. At least that is what I am blaming it on.

What else shall I say about myself? I am not sure, I guess more will come out soon. Maybe I will just keep adding on to this. We will see. It is my blog, right? I can do what I want to do, right??